It's no surprise that parents of kids with behavior problems are
super keen to discover helpful discipline techniques as handling kids
with bad behavior can be an absolute nightmare.
There is no single "one size fits all" discipline strategy that works with all children because all children have different temperaments and personalities. So stopping bad behavior in children comes down to trying a variety of discipline methods until you find one that works effectively with your individual child.
Here are five discipline methods you can try with your child that will hopefully bring a swift end to his or her bad behavior:
Prevent Problems From Occurring
Taking a preventative discipline approach is a great way to stop bad behavior and problems from occurring in the first place. Take away temptations that are too great for your child, such as putting markers or your makeup case out of reach of your toddler if you don't want them using these items, or not keeping chips and sweets in the house if your ignores your request for them not to eat these items before dinner. Set your child up for success and you'll prevent much of the bad behavior and avoid a lot of drama.
Give Your Child Choices
When possible, give your child the opportunity to select between two alternate choices to give them some control over the situation. For instance, if your child resists getting dressed in the morning, giving him or her two outfits to choose from will take the focus off the power struggle over getting dressed and dissolve the bad behavior. Letting your child feel like they have some control by giving them choices makes cooperation natural and easy.
1,2,3, Consequence
The 1,2,3, Consequence technique can be a very effective discipline strategy if used correctly and with consistency. The key is that there has to be an "uncomfortable" punishment delivered on 3 - EVERY TIME. Your child must be 100% certain that if they haven't done what you have asked of them by the time you count to 3, the consequence WILL be delivered.
The consequence can be the same every time, such as a time-out. Or it can be a consequence related to the specific request you made, such as: "If you haven't put your toys away by the time I count to 3, I will have to take them away for 1 week."
If you use the 1,2,3, Consequence technique with absolute consistency, eventually all you will have to do is put up 1 finger (anywhere, anytime) and your child will stop what they are doing immediately to avoid the consequence. Remember, consistency is the key to making this discipline technique work.
Object Time-outs
A twist on the traditional concept of time-outs, the next time your children are fighting over a toy, put the toy in time-out instead of putting one or both children in time-out. They'll start waiting it out staring longingly at the toy until inevitably one of them loses interest and finds something else to play with.
Likewise, the next time your children fight over television shows or video games, put the TV or video console into time-out. Simply switch off the device, then set a timer for 10 minutes and advise your children that they are not allowed to turn it back on until the timer goes off. The great thing about this discipline strategy is that it ends the bad behaviour quickly and you don't have to take sides.
I Don't Understand
When your child speaks to you inappropriately, simply proclaim incomprehension. Look at them with a confused expression - as if they are speaking a foreign language - and simply say: "I can't understand you when you talk like that."
If your child is whining, do the same thing but instead say: "I don't understand 'Whinese.' Can you please speak in English." Then ignore your child until they speak to you in a more appropriate way. They'll soon learn that speaking to you respectfully in a "normal" tone is the best way to get your attention and actually get a response from you.
There is no single "one size fits all" discipline strategy that works with all children because all children have different temperaments and personalities. So stopping bad behavior in children comes down to trying a variety of discipline methods until you find one that works effectively with your individual child.
Here are five discipline methods you can try with your child that will hopefully bring a swift end to his or her bad behavior:
Prevent Problems From Occurring
Taking a preventative discipline approach is a great way to stop bad behavior and problems from occurring in the first place. Take away temptations that are too great for your child, such as putting markers or your makeup case out of reach of your toddler if you don't want them using these items, or not keeping chips and sweets in the house if your ignores your request for them not to eat these items before dinner. Set your child up for success and you'll prevent much of the bad behavior and avoid a lot of drama.
Give Your Child Choices
When possible, give your child the opportunity to select between two alternate choices to give them some control over the situation. For instance, if your child resists getting dressed in the morning, giving him or her two outfits to choose from will take the focus off the power struggle over getting dressed and dissolve the bad behavior. Letting your child feel like they have some control by giving them choices makes cooperation natural and easy.
1,2,3, Consequence
The 1,2,3, Consequence technique can be a very effective discipline strategy if used correctly and with consistency. The key is that there has to be an "uncomfortable" punishment delivered on 3 - EVERY TIME. Your child must be 100% certain that if they haven't done what you have asked of them by the time you count to 3, the consequence WILL be delivered.
The consequence can be the same every time, such as a time-out. Or it can be a consequence related to the specific request you made, such as: "If you haven't put your toys away by the time I count to 3, I will have to take them away for 1 week."
If you use the 1,2,3, Consequence technique with absolute consistency, eventually all you will have to do is put up 1 finger (anywhere, anytime) and your child will stop what they are doing immediately to avoid the consequence. Remember, consistency is the key to making this discipline technique work.
Object Time-outs
A twist on the traditional concept of time-outs, the next time your children are fighting over a toy, put the toy in time-out instead of putting one or both children in time-out. They'll start waiting it out staring longingly at the toy until inevitably one of them loses interest and finds something else to play with.
Likewise, the next time your children fight over television shows or video games, put the TV or video console into time-out. Simply switch off the device, then set a timer for 10 minutes and advise your children that they are not allowed to turn it back on until the timer goes off. The great thing about this discipline strategy is that it ends the bad behaviour quickly and you don't have to take sides.
I Don't Understand
When your child speaks to you inappropriately, simply proclaim incomprehension. Look at them with a confused expression - as if they are speaking a foreign language - and simply say: "I can't understand you when you talk like that."
If your child is whining, do the same thing but instead say: "I don't understand 'Whinese.' Can you please speak in English." Then ignore your child until they speak to you in a more appropriate way. They'll soon learn that speaking to you respectfully in a "normal" tone is the best way to get your attention and actually get a response from you.
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